“There is no country in this world, no corner of the earth, where you wouldn’t find Nigerians,” is a running joke among Nigerians. As citizens of the largest Black nation in the world, it is not rare for Nigerians to declutter and move out of their indigenous homes in search of greener pastures. A consequence of this emigration is generations down the line battling with feelings of displacement, like Tolu Oye did.
As far back as two generations, “home” is a muddled concept for the Oye family. It is in London, where her paternal grandparents moved during the 1900s, that they succeeded in rebuilding a home. On weekends they’d invite fellow African migrants, who showed up in African and English mix-and-match garbs, to make merry – attempting to replicate the communal living of Nigeria.
At the age of five, Tolu, along with her nuclear family, immigrated to Columbus, Ohio, where she learnt how deep her mother’s love for Ankara runs. If she didn’t insist that her children wore the fabric too, Tolu might not have minded. Instead, every year, her and her siblings, embarrassed and teary-eyed from their indisputable Ankara African attire, were dragged to a photography studio at their Columbus Midwestern mall, enduring piercing stares and feelings of incongruity. But on a forced trip back to Nigeria in 2012, her sense of identity changed. “I now wanted to explore my culture on my own,” she tells AMAKA.
At 16 she moved to New York by herself to pursue her love for fashion design. With her reimagination of traditional Yoruba hairstyles, Tolu has been acknowledged as one of the women revitalising braids, and with her mother, co-founded Oyegreen, a beauty brand established on their appreciation for shea butter. The founder and fashion designer of Meji Meji clothing, as seen on Tems, employs fashion to showcase Black culture.
On one occasion, Tolu decided to take another turn on her unending journey to celebrating her Nigerian roots. With Meji Meji Home, a cosy rental space in Lagos that includes a bedroom and kitchen area, she has built for herself and others who need it a haven to unwind, unplug, and be innumerably creative.
AMAKA spoke with the fashion designer to hear all about the process.
When you think of home, what comes to mind?
As an abstract concept, I think of scenery and peace. Physically, I refer to home as Lagos. With Lagos there’s usually a lot going on and sometimes this intense activity overflows and spills into enjoyable chaos, but after a while the need to take a breather catches up with me. When this happens, all I need is a safe space where I can come in, ease my mind, and think properly.
That is actually how I came along with Meji Meji. Prior to it, I wasn’t satisfied with a lot of the interior of the Airbnb I saw. I wanted something minimal, I don’t want a lot, I just want to come home and relax. Even at Meji Meji Home there’s no TV, if I feel like watching something I’m going to use my iPad but I prefer just being in my thoughts.
On your first return to Nigeria in 2012, especially considering that it wasn’t a trip you were particularly looking forward to, did anything feel familiar and reconnect you to home?
I think I was around the age of 13 or 14 at the time. Even in the predominantly white Columbus where we live in the US, I grew up in a very traditional home where my parents would consistently speak Yoruba to me, but being in Nigeria that day was a different ball game entirely. Race as a concept no longer existed, I was not Black, just a person like everyone else.
I honestly hated who I was when I was younger. Like my mum would constantly straighten my hair so I’d be accepted, but I didn’t need to dilute my Blackness in Nigeria. I finally felt accepted and remember thinking ‘Okay, I like Nigeria’. I’ve been going back ever since then.
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Would you say the trip changed your idea of home and identity?
Yeah, most definitely. I used to think of home like it was a part of my past – ‘Oh, I was born in Nigeria’. I mean, I left Nigeria at the age of 5 so my formative years were here. I was excited to reconnect with family members and old friends from primary school, and just being back home in general. It wasn’t even like I was being forced, I genuinely wanted to be home.
I wanted to explore my culture on my own. This led me to taking a solo trip back home in 2016. I was 18 at the time and it felt surreal. I was like 'Okay, I want to know what my purpose in life is', and I now know it to be showcasing my culture and identity in different forms. A lot of people are familiar with the creativity with which I do my hair, and also with my clothing brand and now Meji Meji Home – it’s all about showcasing the beauty of Nigeria and Africa.
How did the idea for Meji Meji Home form?
I’ve always wanted to live a bicontinental life – in Nigeria and America. It’s one of those things I had on my bucket list. So after I graduated from uni in 2020, I moved to Nigeria to experience what living there is like. I had actually been coming home consistently from 2018 – I spent my 2018 and 2019 December in Nigeria, and had been connecting with a lot of creatives off of Instagram. My parents’ house is in Ibadan but when I came in 2020, I wanted to stay in Lekki. I got this Airbnb and it just wasn’t up to the standard of what I was paying for, and it occurred to me that I could try my hands at it and make it even better by extending it to a space for other people.
The idea is not far-fetched because hosting is part of what my friends in the states know me for. I’m a 'Imma cook for everyone' type of person, I just love bringing people together. So that is what Meji Meji Home is for me, but instead of hosting we are offering a space for creatives to do what they want. Our space has been used for video production, film, photography, comedy skits, content creation, wellness workshops, fashion and editorial campaigns, and so much more. When I think about how far we’ve come, I’m mind blown. I just wanted a safe space for people to come together and unwind.
Has the idea of Meji Meji Home evolved from what it started with?
There’s this Nigerian influencer, Amy Okoli, who shot her ad for Spotify there and I loved every minute of it. Even top brands like Absolut Vodka have done their brand campaign there. I literally have a cousin who has nothing to do within the creative scene and he will call me and be like, “Oh I just love Meji Meji Home so much.” It brings me a lot of joy and makes me feel like I’m serving a need to the creative community in Lagos.
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The home is currently undergoing some renovations with you at the same time outside Nigeria. How has the experience been so far?
I had someone who oversaw the renovation so we’d constantly go back and forth in terms of what I wanted. The main thing that we really renovated was the wall space by the bedside because we wanted to make it feel more inclusive with the entire space. Originally, there were lots of blank walls that we left blank because we wanted it to be minimal enough that it doesn’t look the same in every picture. But we ended up realising that it was just that – a blank space.
Our renovations took four months but it was supposed to last only one. It took longer than we expected because we really wanted sandstone paint. When I look at the home, I think of a vacation to Bali or the Mediterranean art period so that’s the vibe I think of when I’m creating the home. We would create a Pinterest board of the new vibe the home was going to give, even down to changing the logo. We had a very big chunky 'M' before but we simplified it to give it more of a luxe vibe. Yeah, that was the entire process.
How would you say your background in fashion influences designing the space?
When I originally designed the space, I had a map layout and drew what each room was going to look like. So because I already had a mapped out visual of what I wanted, I would just show it to each artisan. Being able to showcase my wants, through sketches from my experience in fashion, definitely helped in reducing back-and-forths and mistakes with artisans.
You revealed that for you and your siblings, there’s the struggle of not being American enough or not being Nigerian enough. Do you think building Meji Meji Home has made the struggle easier?
I think it was really Meji Meji itself that did that, because while I was building Meji Meji Home, my primary focus was on Meji Meji, the clothing brand. So when I was in Nigeria at the time, people saw my interest for what it was. It wasn’t like “this girl is coming to Nigeria to steal our culture then take it back to America to profit off of it.”
They really saw that, “Oh, Tolu is actually genuine. Like this girl may be more Nigerian than I am” and I’d be asked questions like, “how do you know all these old-school songs?” So I think building the clothing brand was a green card that solidified that this is who I really am.