"An honest man is always a child"—Socrates

As a man, you are never not reminded about your role and the responsibilities that come with it—a noble cause ingrained in the heads of all male species.

As a young boy, you quickly realize that at the end of the tunnel is the weight of the world—not some light of hope and peace, but a lifetime of selfless work for everyone but yourself. With it come additional rules that you must adhere to if you ever want to get the badge of "man" in society—rules that govern your reaction, posture, dressing, interests, and many more. As a result, most men realize that life is nothing but a transactional relationship; we are rewarded only when we give.

When you're told that the only way to get respect is to give up yourself and serve society, it's easy to fall into a hole of insecurity because what you're being told is that you're not enough. The only way you can be near enough is if you satisfy the needs of those around you. As a result, most men lose that individuality, especially if it doesn't align with the conventional definition of a man.

So what you see are several men, driven not by love or individuality but rather by the fear of not being recognized as a "man," but this fear is never expressed but masked.

There is a large masking of fear, or any form of emasculating traits, because these traits aren't ones that any man should possess, so rather than exposing itself as fear, they manifest into something else, be it anger, passively aggressiveness, silence, impulsiveness, controlling behaviors, and many more, but never the fear itself.

An example of how this could manifest is a jealous man who controls his partner on what she can or cannot wear. This happens as opposed to the communication of his insecurities, fears, and worries.

This idea of proper and improper masculinity has been deeply ingrained in our societies. Generations after each other, fathers, mothers, relatives, and society have told the man who he was before he could even know himself.

Sayings mixed with indirect threats

"No woman will like you."

"No one will respect you."

"Are you even a man?"

This and many more songs play diminishing tunes in the ear of a man.

This could make us understand why some men can be easily influenced by extreme masculine content online because, at the core of masculinity, there is fear—fear that could easily be triggered. All he needs to start with is "Girls will never respect you if..." and in the blink of an eye, you've grabbed the attention of the man.

The truth is that some men easily fit the traditional male personality, but those men don't represent all men, and all men have various interpretations of what a man is. Whereas some men can be assertive and strong, some could also be loving and caring; both could exist as men and make our society better.

This isn't an attack on men or masculinity, but rather what the drivers of these roles are—is it individuality or fear? A question that we should reflect on and figure out individually so we find ourselves outside the chains of fear and come out the other side healthier and healed, better for society.