That’s an egotistic title I know but I seem to lack the exact words to describe this journey I want to begin. I want to fall head over heels madly in love with me. Because how else can I fall in love with someone else if I don’t know how to love myself? Self-love is not just a phrase to be tossed about it’s a state of mind a way of life and I'm getting back on that road I seem to have derailed.

It's been a while since I have written for a moment I thought I had forgotten but fortunately, it seems I haven’t. I have been falling in love with love lately. No, I'm not in a relationship but I have been falling in love with myself, with my family and friends. A part of me realizes that I have been surrounded by love I just haven’t been showing up to receive that love. You can be loved but fail to accept that love.

I have been speaking words of love to myself in the mirror but haven’t felt that love. That’s because a part of me wasn’t receiving that love. So I'm taking a step to having a healthy perception of love. I am actively reaching out to friends and family and showing up for myself. I'm doing the things I have always wanted for myself.

What I’m talking about may have you rolling your eyes but the truth is I have been neglecting myself I haven’t been choosing me. I haven’t been ready to receive love but I am now. I love the woman I am becoming. I'm learning to love my friends and family. So there's this thing I was doing last year I was surviving I wasn’t falling in love with me. But this year I decided I would teach myself discipline and somehow that was the key to unlocking my acceptance of love. I want to fall in love with someone special but I'm not ready to share myself yet. It will take some days, weeks or maybe months but hopefully not a year. I want to make sure I'm completely in love with me.