In the world of love and relationships, trust is singularly one of the most important aspect. Whether you are in a long distance relationship or you work separately or in terms of the friends you keep - you need trust to scale through with your partner.

What happens, though, if your partner adds a surprising clause—a DNA test—to the mix after everything you have been through, perhaps even marriage?

The way DNA tests work today is similar to giving a well-known story an unexpected twist. You know, like seeing Jackie Chan playing the villain in a Spanish movie. Just imagine that your partner out of the blue proposes a DNA test. “Why now” you begin to wonder? “Don’t they believe in me?” “Why do we require a DNA?” Your connection may become loosed as a result of these inquiries.

But let's look this further. Is it conceivable that some people ask for a DNA test because they have suspicions? Or is it more concerned with handling conceivable biological uncertainties?

Is it really that easy to request for a DNA test out of the blue, then when it is all said and done - the baby is yours - then all things will go back to usual, like nothing like “lack-of-trust” just took place?

A very complex mixture of elements makes up our relationships and also the range of emotions that we experience in our lives. So, including a DNA test is a valid option if you feel the need to do so for your own peace of mind and clarity purpose, but another angle is: Should you inform your partner of this choice? Is it a matter of trust or is it just a precaution?

You might say "Fuck it! Why risk causing problems? I’ll just do it on a low-key.” That might work. But the goal is to make sure you don't unintentionally introduce uncertainty into your relationship. It's important to treat that dread cautiously since it taps into something bigger than just you.

Be aware, that it's crucial to take this decision from an ethical perspective. Although, it makes sense to want things to be clear, this desire needs to be balanced. Any DNA testing should only be carried out with the full knowledge and approval of all parties. Which is why communication is important in relationships.

Did you know that, although rare, hospitals have switched babies before? It’s not common, but it is not unheard of.

You must bear in mind a few considerations as you set out on this road of managing the difficulties of DNA testing in partnerships. Empathy, honest communication, and understanding are big components that can make a huge impact, just as in any case.

Think of each relationship as a singular tale with its own unique traits and you know, good times and bad times. Since no two relationships are the same, it's always important to approach or listen to “the conversations” concerning DNA test with an open mind and a willingness to consider your partner's viewpoint. Respecting their emotions and worries while understanding that their experience is an essential component of your togetherness. 

One might not even necessarily be doing it out of suspicions, it might just be a “necessity” to them, as I have heard one man say.

Don't be afraid to ask for help or professional advice if the conversation becomes difficult to handle. You can always seek relationship counselors or therapists for assistance in addressing and resolving any concerns, just as individuals seek professional counseling in a variety of life situations. For the smoothest possible romantic journey, these experts may offer insightful advice and practical tactics (even though, I know seeking professional help is a very uncommon practice for Nigerians.)

Together, you can determine the best course of action for your circumstances, one that upholds the values of respect for privacy and consent as well as the fundamentals of love and trust. I certainly believe that to address any remaining worries or uncertainties and ensure a kinda smooth flow for your relationship to keep developing and thriving, it is essential to uphold trust and be open with one another.

In matters of the heart, trust is a big deal, but it's also important to confirm and answer any worries or queries that may surface. You can build a strong, robust connection that will enable you to overcome troubles as a couple if you approach this journey with communication, care and compassion.

Otuosoro Ranjo
Image credit: Smart DNA