A week after we started dating

I woke up from my nap and there was this feeling I couldn’t shake

I was happy

It was strange and foreign

Because if I wasn’t lulling in a pool of anxiety

A depressive episode had its fingers wrapped around my neck, nails digging in

I convinced myself I dreamt you up

You couldn’t exist outside of my mind

There’s no one but my anxiety to hold my hand and tighten its grip when I try to catch my breath

So when my doorbell rang, it startled me

No one visits anymore

At the sight of you, the air in my lungs emptied out

At the feel of your skin, tears rolled down my cheeks

At the sound of your laugh, I clutched you tighter

Then the fear settled in and I leapt back,

Fearing that you may only be a figment of my imagination.