*Be free to insert “Not all men” as you please.

Remember when Jay z said that he would no longer call women the B word because he has a

daughter ( umm thanks?). He said, “Before I got in the game, made a change, and got rich/ I

didn't think hard about using the word bitch/I rapped, I flipped it, I sold it, I lived it/Now with

my daughter in this world I curse those that give it. No man will degrade her, or call her

name/I'm so focused on your future, the degradation has passed/ I wish you wealth, health

and insight/Forever young you may pass/Blue Ivy Carter, my angel.”

It seems that these men only realise that women are people who are worthy of being treated

with respect once they have daughters. A moment of realisation on how they treat women,

and almost like a fear that their own daughters might get the same treatment from other men.

This seems to be the case for rapper, Ye as in the lyrics of his song, ‘Violent Crimes’ from his

2018 self titled album ‘Ye’, he says,

“Niggas is savage, niggas is monsters

Niggas is pimps, niggas is players

'Til niggas have daughters, now they precautious

Father forgive me, I'm scared of the karma

'Cause now I see women as somethin' to nurture

Not somethin' to conquer”

He goes on to refer to rapper Nicki Minaj to show his hopes that his daughters may be as

successful as her but not as sexually promiscuous and this reveals a phenomenon known as

the Madonna-Whore complex, which sees women as either virgins who are innocent and

saints or sexually promiscuous whores. It has been argued by feminists that this misogynistic

way of thinking is dangerous, limiting to women’s identities and in general, a less progressive

way of thinking.

Sigmund Freud, The founder of psychoanalysis, has coined this term and in describing the

Madonna-Whore complex, has stated that it is, “Where such men love, they have no desire

and where they desire, they cannot love.”

It is crazy to think that these men have had relationships or encounters with other women in

their lives before, maybe with their mothers, wives, sisters, co-workers and possibly friends,

but why does this realisation that certain behaviours and way of thinking that they have had

their whole lives are harmful to a whole population of people only arrive when they have

their own daughters?

In one of her speeches, Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez said “I believe having a daughter does not

make a man decent. Having a wife does not make a decent man, Treating people with dignity

and respect makes a decent man, and when a decent man messes up, as we all are bound to

do, he tries his best and does apologise.”